Saturday, July 3, 2010
Website
So I was there sitting on my bed bored as hell. My phone was silent (no surprise there) since everyone was busy with their summer jobs and I'm stuck at home. (parents banned me from applying to jobs claiming that I was a work-a-holic. please tell me you rolled your eyes also) I got really bored and decided to try my hardest to make a way to get money and stumbled upon a research facility that pays you to get your opinion on things. At first I was super excited since my first survey paid me twenty five bucks (big smiley face) But then I realized how annoying it was to sit at the computer, filling out pages after pages of answers (huge sigh) and quickly became bored again. Then I decided, what the hay, I'm going to start my own website..... nobody told me how tedious it was to create my own website -_- But I will press on. I'm going to try to do this (lol) and hopefully find a survey that I would enjoy doing to earn a couple of bucks.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Alone
So there I was, alone
i had a chance to finally have the boy that has made a mansion in my heart
had a chance to lay to rest all of the rumors of the wonders of sex
has a chance to be happy since he is the one who understands my moods the best
and i had to say no
no to my happiness, love, heart
since i was a christian
you can't have an unequal yoke relationship
yes he doesn't go to church
i have no idea if he believes in God
but HE never judged me
HE never made fun at my sometimes socially awkward self
HE never turned his back on me when i had slow moments
HE embraced me when i was drained at the end of the day
i wanted so bad to say yes to my happiness
yes yes yes
to my chance to finally have a complete heart
after the many times he broke it when he was with another girl
but no, i revert to my old self
even after so many years, when i "grew up"
when i get too close to him, i become young again
inexperienced, blubbering, nervous, shy, fidgety
but he put up with it
only to have me say no
because of my conscious
warning me that i was giving into temptation
so where does that leave me?
there is no boy waiting for me at home
no boy that is for me in church
no boy at the streets who know my name
so therefore i am
alone
i had a chance to finally have the boy that has made a mansion in my heart
had a chance to lay to rest all of the rumors of the wonders of sex
has a chance to be happy since he is the one who understands my moods the best
and i had to say no
no to my happiness, love, heart
since i was a christian
you can't have an unequal yoke relationship
yes he doesn't go to church
i have no idea if he believes in God
but HE never judged me
HE never made fun at my sometimes socially awkward self
HE never turned his back on me when i had slow moments
HE embraced me when i was drained at the end of the day
i wanted so bad to say yes to my happiness
yes yes yes
to my chance to finally have a complete heart
after the many times he broke it when he was with another girl
but no, i revert to my old self
even after so many years, when i "grew up"
when i get too close to him, i become young again
inexperienced, blubbering, nervous, shy, fidgety
but he put up with it
only to have me say no
because of my conscious
warning me that i was giving into temptation
so where does that leave me?
there is no boy waiting for me at home
no boy that is for me in church
no boy at the streets who know my name
so therefore i am
alone
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